


The only way

by AngelKurenai



Category: Supernatural
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-26
Updated: 2016-01-26
Packaged: 2018-05-16 10:25:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,409
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5824942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AngelKurenai/pseuds/AngelKurenai
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>You make a deal to save Dean from the mark of cain which only results in you being Crowley's queen. But Dean won't give up on you so easily.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The only way

"So then of course I had to cut his heart open because obviously that's where they had to hide the key" Crowley said simply, taking a sip of hi whiskey.  
  
You made a face and opted for putting the croissant you were about to eat, on its plate, instead of just eating it, you knew perfectly well that it was not going to stay in your stomach for long; if Crowley continued talking about matters like this, anyway.  
  
No matter how many times before he had done this - talking about torturing or killing people during breakfast - you knew you were not going to get used to it. Too bad that you had to, though.  
  
"Crowley" you merely said at him and he just raised an eyebrow. You shook your head and took a sip of your coffee just as he took a sip of his whiskey.  
  
"I can't believe you're seriously drinking this early" you looked at him with a frown.  
  
"Why not?" he shrugged.  
  
"Well, because it is harmful for your health, that is why. But I guess you wouldn't really care about dying since you are already dead" you ended up muttering.  
  
"That is very much true but hey, careful there. It seems as if you actually care about me" he said with a smirk and you rolled your eyes.  
  
"Well, and you know that it is not true, anyway. I just want to talk and since you are the only one available here, that's what I am doing. But I guess that you are not going to be for much longer, after all" you said matter-of-factly.  
  
"Oh love, if you want me to stay then of course I will. I am a thoughtful husband and I don't want to my beautiful wife to be sad. What kind of king would I be after all? If I couldn't so much provide my queen with what she needs." he said with a smile and you once again rolled your eyes.  
  
"What I really want is to get out of- out of this place." you said looking around you.  
  
"Hell Kingdom, and this is my castle" he said and you just glared at him.  
  
"But that is not going to happen-" you said.  
  
"Obviously" he added, cutting you off.  
  
"-So I am just asking you to get me rid of your presence as soon as possible today, _please_ " you said with a smile and it was his time to roll his eyes now.  
  
"Well, darling I don't think you really should talk like that to your husband. What will somebody think if they hear you, huh? That I am forcing you to live here with me- Oh no wait, I am. Because that was the deal and back then I didn't force you to say yes" he said smugly and you clenched your jaw to hold yourself from saying or doing anything that would have an impact... on you.  
  
"No. You didn't. I agreed on my own that if I got married to you then Dean-" you swallowed the lump in your throat, at the mere mention of his name tears always threatened to spill  "-Then Dean would no longer have to suffer from The Mark. That you would get rid of it."  
  
"And so I did. I kept my part of the deal and now it's just your turn" he said with a small shrug.  
  
"Yeah, for a deal that is never going to end anyway" you mumbled.  
  
"Hey, now you knew that that's how it was going to be. Besides, it's been what? One year? That you are here. You have to get used to it, love. Because I am not letting you go, no matter what" he said with a smug smile and you shook your head.  
  
"I still find it hard to believe though- Why me? And why- all of this. Me being your wife and that" you asked him frowning.  
  
"Well, as I told you I needed a queen. Every king does. It was the only way, besides torturing, that I could make some demons follow me. And having you, one of the most strong hunters on Earth besides the Winchesters, being that queen was the perfect idea. Now, Dean having The Mark of Cain, me knowing how to get rid of it and you being desperate to help him because you love was just a jackpot" he said and took a sip of his drink.  
  
"Oh what now? You really thought I hadn't realized how you felt about squirrel? Hey, he may be blind and hadn't realized it all these years you were hunting buds but I am Crowley, love. And that says a lot" he winked at you with a smirk and you clenched your fists, trying desperately to keep yourself from punching him or maybe... even crying then and there.  
  
The mere thought of Dean brought tears in your eyes. You had missed him, very much, and this one year that you had been away from him was literally hell - the king of hell sleeping in the next room was just a bonus to make matters worse. You had refused to share a room with him no matter what and no matter how much time passed you were not going to agree to it or indulge in any of his needs. He could just as well go find any other woman he wanted to please him. You loved Dean, even though it scared you to admit it, and you were not going to betray him in that way. Sure it wasn't exactly betraying because you never were actually together but you knew just as much as you feared that you loved that man with all your heart. And- even if you had to be away from him and suffer, you would do so as long as you knew that he was alright with no Mark of Cain burdening him.  
  
There were moments you actually wanted to tear you hear apart than watch Dean in the situation he was in. It hurt more than you would ever imagine and more that it was ever possible - and you _had_ been in a lot of pain in your life. But seeing Dean like that? Oh dear, that _did_ hurt. You did as much as you could. Offering him a shoulder to lean on and a bed at nights when The Mark, its urges and the nightmares were too much for him to handle. You'd never done anything and none of you had shown any sings that you actually wanted to be more than just friends. _You_ hadn't at least, because you highly doubted Dean would ever see you that way.  
  
"Hello? Hell to (Y/n)? You there?" Crowley's voice broke your trail of thoughts and you looked up at him.  
  
You took in a shaky breath and cursed yourself for showing weakness in front of him "What?" you said harshly.  
  
"Hey, I didn't say anything!" he raised his hands in surrender then laughed "But I was just wondering if you really want me to stay here and not-"  
  
"Oh please no!" you cut him off "I just want some time to myself too. This place may be freaking boring but with you in it it is much worse. Shouldn't you have left by now anyway?" you raised an eyebrow at him.  
  
"Ah I am just waiting for someone to bring a couple things I need and then I will be gone. And you- you will have the peace you want so much" he said matter-of-factly and you nodded.  
  
"Well finally" you muttered and leaned over the huge table to bring the plate with pancakes closer to you.  
  
"You're wearing white? And it is a dress?" Crowley asked looking at you with a smirk and you rolled your eyes at him.  
  
"Yeah, no way Crowley. Forget it. But to answer your question yes, obviously. Why?" you asked taking a bite of your pancake.  
  
"Nothing it's just a bit unusual of you. Anyway, though I really think you should be wearing something else. For example one of the dresses I bought you." he explained.  
  
"Yeah, no thanks. I'll pass. I don't want to look like a hooker" you muttered and he rolled his eyes.  
  
"You won't. You will look just what you are. The Queen of Hell. Anyway, though, black would be more preferable next time, or a really dark color anyway" he said finishing his drink.  
  
"Whatever, Crowley. Just go, don't wanna be late on your date do you? You have people to torture after all" you said and he chuckled.  
  
"Yeah but come on, why don't you look a little bit less happy that I'm leaving?" he said getting up from his chair.  
  
"I'll try" you said putting on a big smile and he rolled his eyes, immediately vanishing from your sight.  
  
You let out a sigh as soon as you were sure he was good and rested your head against the back of the chair. You bit your lip to keep the tears from falling but it seemed like a battle you were about to lose. You shook your head and sat up from your chair.  
  
You made your way through the huge dining room and walked towards the doors. You opened them and after glancing at the two demons by the door, one on each side, you rolled your eyes and looking down you walked the hallway and made your way to the library. Very well aware of the presence of the two demons behind your back following you on every step. That's how it was ever since you said yes to Crowley, anyway, and agreed to become his wife to free Dean of The Mark. There were always at least two demons following your every movement, making sure you were not going anywhere and of course not running away from Crowley.  
  
You stayed for a while in the library, searching through books you knew would be interesting and soon found a couple that you liked. That's how most days would go by. With you finding a book and reading it in less than a week, no matter how big it was. That was of course when Crowley didn't drag you somewhere to show you off and of course you had to pretend that you loved him.  
  
You had soon walked up to your room and closed the door behind you, not bothering to even so glance at the two men - demons, anyway.  
  
Reading a book in peace was all you wanted to do and-  
  
-clearly what you were not going to do today.  
  
People fighting could be heard from a far distance and you immediately panicked. You knew Crowley had many enemies, as well, that would not hesitate to kill you or take you in order to get what they wanted from the king of hell. They had tried it before but of course had not succeeded because Crowley had returned - earlier than expected - and taken matters into his own hands.  
  
This was not going to happen today as it seemed.  
  
You opened your door slightly, just to see what was going on only for your eyes to widen at seeing the two demons laying cold dead on the ground, just a few feet away from the door. The man that had killed them was there, bent over them so you couldn't see him. Not that you wanted to. You knew that if he saw you then that's how you were going to end as well.  
  
Before you could realize it though the door squeaked under your weight and your eyes widened even more when you saw the figure of the killer stiffen, which meant he heard you.  
  
You cursed under your breath but then you realized that he - or _it_ most probably - heard you, so without waiting a second beat you closed the door - or more like slammed it close because you surely made more noise than you intended. You held onto the door handle as if your life depended on it and closed your eyes, biting your lip and praying to every god you knew that you were going to make it.  
  
The door-handle started moving and your eyes snapped open. You noticed that the key was on the keyhole and of course twisted it so that you would lock the door. You heard banging on the door and saw the door-handle move even more frantically. You slowly walked away from the door and cursed yourself for not having any kind of weapon to defend yourself. You walked on the far corner of the room and hopefully out of sight.  
  
Just as the banging stopped silence followed and it honestly was deafening. Your eyes were wide and widened even more when the person starting banging on the door probably with all of his weight because he had soon broken in, into your room.   
  
And that is when your heart stopped.  
  
There in front of you stood the man that you were hoping to, but knew you were not going to, see for the rest of your life. The man whose mere presence could have your heart hammering in your chest, your palms sweating and your stomach fill with butterflies. The man whose green eyes you could stare at for hours to no end and whose smile sent you on cloud nine. The man who you knew that you loved and were going to love til you left your last breath.  
  
"Dean" you breathed out and you saw his posture straighten.  
  
His head snapped to your direction, his eyes were wide and his mouth hung agape. His eyes roamed your whole figure and then focused on your face, looking at you as if he was searching for a sign that it was really you.  
  
He lowered his gun and turned fully to you, slowly approaching you "(Y/n)" he breathed out.  
  
You dared to smile a little bit but the way he looked at you, so much pain in his eyes and exhaustion, really made your smile fade. It was not how you expected to see him. You thought that now that Dean did not have The Mark he would not be like before but here he was... worse than before. Exhaustion obvious all over his face, the slight scruff that was there while he had The Mark most times, it was now there too. There were bags under his eyes that proved to the fact that he had not slept good (or at all) for a couple days, or hell even weeks.  
  
"Oh Dean" you put a shaking hand over your mouth as you stared at him. You were unable to form any more words.  
  
And it obviously wasn't needed as you saw Dean's gun fall on the ground and him quickly close the distance between you, coming as close as possible to you and enveloping you in his arms. You brought your shaking hands around him and hugged him just as tightly, clenching your fists as you held onto his jacket, and burying your face in his broad chest while breathing in the scent you had missed so much over this one year. Dean's scent. And you couldn't help the tears that started to flow as you felt Dean's own tears come into contact with your exposed shoulders.  
  
You both slowly pulled away and looked at each other's tear-stained faces. He slowly brought a shaky hand to cup your cheek and as soon as your skin came into contact with his you couldn't stop the whimper kind of sound that left your mouth. You had really started to wonder, now, what hurt most. Seeing him suffer because of The Mark or being away from him and knowing that he suffered more than before, even though he did no longer have The Mark.  
  
"Why?" he breathed out, voice huskier than before; resting his forehead against yours.  
  
"It was the only way" you mumbled glancing at the arm where The Mark used to be "I couldn't stand it, Dean. I couldn't stand seeing you like that. You were suffering and I- I couldn't do anything. When Crowley offered me this deal to become his wife so that he would take away The Mark I- I couldn't just let it pass by. It was the only way I could help you."  
  
"Help me? (Y/n) you did all of this just because of that stupid Mark?" he asked and you nodded pulling away from him and running a hand through your hair "And what about after that (Y/n)? Did you ever think how I would be when I woke up that morning and you would be gone? Do you realize how much more that hurt than having that fucking Mark on me? Do you realize that I lost my mind when I thought I lost you? Do you realize what I went through this year, trying to find you, researching and beating the hell out of demons to get information on where you had gone? Do you?!" he all-but-shouted and you just stared at him with wide and glistening eyes.  
  
"I'm sorry, Dean. I just- I just wanted to help you. I never- I never meant for any of this to happen. I just wanted you to be ok. To be happy. To be the Dean you were before- before The Mark and all the pain it brought" you muttered looking down at your feet.  
  
"Happy? But how would I ever be happy if I didn't have you by my side (Y/n)? I know- I know I am not the best when it comes to expressing feelings and sure as hell suck at opening up to somebody in that way, specifically, but- (Y/n), I thought that you had realized that despite The Mark, despite the death surrounding me, despite everything I always _was_ happy. A part of me _was_ happy. Because I had you. You were there. And I tried to show it, the best way I could. But as always I screwed up and you- (Y/n) I- I love you, alright? Finding out that you were gone and thinking that I was never going to see you in my life scared me to no end. And it honestly hurt more than I could ever imagine. It felt just like when I lost Sam, and (Y/n), I-" he started rambling but you did not let him finish because you crushed your lips to his.  
  
It was desperate, you would confess to that, and sloppy but you tried to put all the love you felt for him as well as the emotions that had built up all this time in it. Tears were rolling down your cheeks even as you kissed him - _and_ he kissed you back - and you could feel some sobs escaping your throat even though you did not want to. You held onto the hem of his jacket as if your life depended on it and he held you tightly in his firm grip, none of you wanting to let go but of course you both had to.  
  
The need for air was too much to take and you knew you couldn't keep ignoring your lungs that were protesting for air any longer. You both pulled away from the kiss but not from each other.  
  
"I love you too" you whispered, voice barely audible but enough for Dean to hear.  
  
He managed to smile even through his last tears and leaned in to kiss your forehead, the both of you taking in a shaky breath.  
  
"Come on. It's time you left this place" he said, his arms wrapped around your shoulders.  
  
You looked at him with a frown unsure if that was the right thing to do and worried about what would happen when Crowley found out that you run away- with Dean, for that matter.  
  
"Don't worry. Everything's going to be ok. We're going to make. I promise" he said brushing his thumb over your cheek and biting your lip you nodded.  
  
You knew that you would have to fight for what you and Dean had and you knew that it was going to hurt but... you knew just as well that when you would get to be in Dean's arms and he would get to hold you comfortingly just like you did a year ago then... all the pain would be gone.


End file.
